Tuesday, July 30, 2013

The story of Sparkle

Sparkle has been in my life for 26 years. I can hardly believe its been that long. He was a gift from a friend who was trying to comfort me through a difficult period of my life.  Even going back to that time still bring tears when I think about it in my quiet moments. " Here" she said "something to hold onto when you need a hug".  I graciously accepted him and put him away with the baby layettes that I was never going to use. Of all my friends during that time Karen was the most comforting. She didn't tell me things like time heals, you can try again or I know how you feel. She just said here's a hug when you need it. 

It was the first of two miscarriages.  After the second  I gave away the layettes.  There wasn't going to be children for me.   My family and friends  thought I was handling things ok. The truth is not so much.  I was hurt and angry and wondered why me?  Why didn't God bless me with children.  There is no answer.  I had to accept what happened and lean on my faith. This took some time and looking back I can feel God's presence through it all.
                                          Here's Sparkle!
He looks good for a 26 year old bear.  He pictured with afghans I crocheted for the new babies in my life. He photographs well!
 Quite a few times I have placed him in the donation pile for Church garage sales or to give him to a new God child, niece or nephew. Each time I pull him out and put him back. You see
our first born would have been 26 years old this month.  So in July I get to feeling a little sad.  It passes because I'm reminded of all of my blessings that I have and continual to receive. 
Sparkle is a gentle reminder of a dear friend and a life that I once carried inside me.  Yes, every now and then I still need a hug.
This is life as I know it...
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